Stringing XMas Lights

SD 7/23/13; first fill 9/23/13; second fill 11/4/13

It’s April. We here on the east coast in the mid-Atlantic have had a more challenging winter than most. While I love snow and think it’s beautiful, we’ve had so much of it this winter. The average snowfall in this region is between 16-22″ (as measured at the two large airports, one next to DC and the other about 30 miles to the west.)  The 30-yr average for this region is 15.4″.  This winter, we had 32″.

That is not why I titled a blog on my band weight loss journey Stringing XMas Lights.

This is:

What looked like lumpy boobs in the last post now looks like I’m stringing lights.

In frustration, I talked to my therapist, a nurse practitioner who prescribed me Adderall for my constant urges to snack and adjusted my medication. {We added Welbutrin back into my medicine regimen, which I also had to stop before surgery and did not go back on afterwards).

As we were wrapping up and talking about menopausal hormones, I told her that before my surgery I had been on Cytomel and Synthroid, two hormone adjustment medications, that I had not gone back on after my band surgery. She told me that if my hormones were low, there would be no way I would lose weight regardless of what I was doing. So she told me to go get a blood test (and include Vitamin D levels).

I made an appointment with my primary care physician, who scolded me for stopping these two medications and not going back on.  “Why didn’t you go back on?” he asked.  I shrugged.  Because I already take 4-6 medicines and supplements and I’ve always hated taking pills?  I didn’t say that, but that’s probably a big part of the reason.

So I have a renewed prescription for these two medications (generic: lyothyronine and levothyroxine) and we’re going to see if that makes a difference. I expect it will, since my primary Dr. told me that hormones were the gas to my engine, and if I didn’t have the gas the engine wouldn’t run.  (I should have told him I have plenty of gas, but I just thought about that now.)  🙂

Before I go, though, I want to say something about my primary care physician. I have seen this doctor for about 25 years. He used to run a weight loss clinic and helped me lose weight when phen-fen was popular (I always had appropriate testing done each visit while I was on that medication).  He’s my husband’s and son’s PC. His wife was my acupuncturist for several years.  He has a very sarcastic sense of humor, and I know several people who haven’t liked him for that.  However, I’ve always liked people with a sense of humor, regardless of whether it’s clever, witty, goofy, dry, or direct. When I was at my heaviest, he once told me that I looked terrible. Well, he was right. He was also the one who suggested, more than once, the band surgery, and recommended me to the surgeon who performed it when I was finally ready for that solution.

But this time he crossed my line of tolerance. First of all, he poo-pooed my going on Adderall. “Well, of course it’s good for weight loss, it’s a stimulant.” That’s not why I went on it, although I did go on it to counteract a  function of my brain that was making it difficult to control my eating. He also poo-pooed my therapist, for telling me to get the blood test. “What is she going to do with that information? She can’t do anything with that information…those psychiatrists don’t know what they’re doing sometimes…”  To which I should have replied, Well, I like her better than I like you, but I also just thought about that now.

He told me it was a waste of money to get the blood test now, he knew what it should show.  The blood test should be taken after I’d been back on the hormone medications again. While he was scolding me for not going back on those after surgery, he said something that shocked me. After having the whole day to go over it, I realized that I was really pissed off.

He said, “You know, you’re the first patient I know of Dr. A’s that’s a failure.”

“A failure? ” I replied, in a shocked tone. “Well, yes, you’re not supposed to hit plateaus on the band, you’re supposed to have a steady weight loss.”  

I thought about that all day yesterday and by the time I got home after working late, I was fuming. I was even wondering if it was time to find a new primary care physician.

I know exactly what I want to say to him when I go back for a followup in about a month. By the time I go back to see him, I will have had time to prepare this statement so that I can speak it without emotion, because I am not eloquent, nor can I think rationally when I’m emotional about something. This is what I plan to say to him:

“Dr, K, you said something the last time I saw you that really pissed me off. You said I was a failure with the band. Well, that was insulting and mis-informed. I have been a member of band Facebook pages, band forums, band blogs, and band support groups, I can tell you that I am by far not the only person struggling with the band.”

I might even add: “You cannot shame into compliance – I would have lost the weight a long time ago if it were that simple. I hope you’ll think twice if you ever have the urge to say something so denigrating and negative to me in the future. ”  

Support Systems

S – 36 days

Tonight I went back to the Bariatric Support Group for the second time.  When I had my first appointment at the surgeon’s office they handed me a schedule of support group meetings.  The nutritionist I was seeing suggested I go.  I went in March, but the group meeting in April was on the day of my father’s funeral, and the May meeting fell on a night I had a conference call.

I know, from my days in Weight Watchers, that being part of a group and sharing your experiences with other people who are in similar situations is a valuable asset to success.  In addition to this support group I have joined the Bariatric Friendly page/discussion on Facebook and the online Banded Living community (www.bandedliving.com).  The support group at the hospital meets once a month.  These three tools – just like the surgery is a tool – give me the opportunity to a) socially network with a large community of Weight Loss Surgery patients, b) socially network with patients who share the same surgical procedure, and c) meet face to face with medical professionals and other patients in my area to share stories and, possibly, make new friends.

Tonight’s group meeting was a 45 minute general meeting with an LPC (Licensed Professional Counselor) who talked about Food Pushers – people for whom eating is a family obligation or is of social importance.  (The March meeting was about Mindful Eating).  The group then broke into smaller groups by the kind of surgery each of us have had or are going to have.  This was very helpful because it gave me chance, with a health care professional, to get answers to specific questions of relevance.  For instance, I’ve been reading so many comments from all kinds of people in the last few days that some raised concerns.  I had a big disappointment when I read “no starchy potatoes” and “no raw fruits or veggies.”  I ran this by the Lap Band gals in the group tonight and discovered that these are not necessarily true for the Lap Band procedure.  So I’m learning a bunch of things  and getting to “check in” on the reality of what I’m learning with people who have gone through it.

This is another reason why I feel a support group is so important.  I’ve met people who have the same fears, share the same concerns, and experience the same trials (I will have).  These people are my guides through this daunting process.  Afterwards, this same group of people will help keep me on track, give me the encouragement to keep up with new lifestyle, even when I reach the maintenance stage.  At some point, I shall become a guide for someone else getting ready to make his or her journey.

Having a good support system at home, with spouses or other family members, is an absolute given, because we will all need someone to hold our hands at various times through this journey.  But consider setting up additional support systems to give yourself a greater chance of success along the way.

Because sometimes we need all the help we can get.